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As you all know, I wasn’t exactly in love with my job.  In fact I loathed it.  I worked for Satan herself. I was selling my pride and dignity for a paycheck every week.  My aunt is the one who said that a whore is not just the person who sells her body for money, and she was right.  I felt spent, and stressed every day, only to go back for more abuse the next day.  I’ve finally had enough and quit.  I know that it wasn’t the smartest decision, especially in this economy, but I would rather flip burgers than work there for another day.

So now, I’m unemployed, sitting at home, sleeping passed noon everyday, just wasting away.  I feel like I’m at the lowest point I’ve ever been at. I can’t even look at myself in the mirror anymore.  I feel like I’ve let those manipulative bitches at my old job win.  They got what they wanted. They squeezed me out.

I have all this time on my hands now.  I could be working on my fashion line, but I have no money to pay for fabrics.  But that really isn’t it.  I’m pretty resourceful. I just don’t have the drive or the inspiration to design anything.  I’ll start a project, then get frustrated with it a quarter of the way through.

But I have to get off my ass and start doing something constructive with my time.  Like say, finding a new job. That’s why I’ve started a vision board dedicated entirely to finding a new job and living the life I want to start living now.  I put the type of job I want, the kind of apartment I’d like to live in, the type of car I want to have, and the places I’d like to visit on my vision board.

I placed my vision board across from my bed so I could view it easily.  It made me happy looking at this new life I could have. I was excited looking at my vision board. I would look at the portion of my vision board that contained my ideal job and salary, and something started happening. I started to feel something I haven’t felt in a while: Confidence. I felt confident that I would get this job.  I knew without a doubt that I would land this job, and start on this new journey.  Things in my life needed to turn around and change.  Only a positive attitude can help me out of this rut.  Whenever I talk to any of my family members, friends, I tell them ‘WHEN I get a job’ not ‘IF I get a job’.

I spent all of last week applying jobs, and I finally got called back for two jobs! I have interviews next week, and the salary is in the range that I put on my vision board! Really great stuff is starting to happen here, and it’s all thanks to my vision board. I’m really excited to see a turn around in my life.  It’s time I started to take control of career, and stand up for myself in any workplace.  I can’t let people walk all over me, no matter what salary they’re offering.  If I’m not happy with what I’m doing, then it’s just not worth it.

I’m staying positive, and I can see positive things happening around me.

‘Til Next Time (maybe next time I write, I’ll be happily employed)

Shoes Over Booze