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2013 tested me in ways I didn’t think I was prepared for. But you go through life not knowing that you weathered the storm until you see the rainbow. You look back at all the debris, and think, “Wow, I made it.”

The end of the year almost always warrants a time of reflection.  You look back and you’re grateful for what the year gave to you, took away, and most of all, showed you what you’re made of. I’m thankful for everything I learned, and all that I gained. But I’m especially thankful for this coming new year, and the fresh start it brings.

2013 was a hard year for me. It brought a lot of changes, and a purging of negative feelings towards myself and others. I was hard on myself. Looking back, maybe I was a little too hard.  Expecting certain things by unrealistic deadlines, and when those things didn’t happen I only blamed myself for being silly enough to think I could have love. Thinking I was undeserving of love and happiness. I thought love wasn’t for me. It was made for everyone else to enjoy, and for me to watch in envy.

But I don’t believe those things anymore. I believe the best is yet to come and 2014 is going to be a spectacular year. I started 2013 very unsure of where I would be, where I was going. I took a job that I settled for. The salary was substantially lower than what I was asking for, but I took it anyway because I needed a job, and it was stable. Then came my new job. The exact position and the exact salary I wanted. For that, I am grateful. I know now that the power of the subconscious mind is great, and we really are the creators of own reality. So, I’m taking that notion, and I’m running with it.

If we create our own realities, then I am going to create one that is so superb, and grand beyond my wildest dreams. I am not going to limit myself. The sky’s the limit here! I know most people will think that I’m crazy for thinking I can have the life that I am dreaming of, but who’s to say I can’t have the life that I’ve always dreamed of? It’s my life.

This coming new year I know exactly (down to the very last detail) where I am going, and what I am going to be. I have gained so much clarity this year, I see my future crystal clear.

The thought of 2014 brings so much excitement. I get butterflies just thinking about it. I can’t wait to start building my wealth. Focusing more on my personal relationships with my sisters, and friends. But most of all, I am going to focus more on myself. I have forgotten that I need love and attention, too. And it’s my job to give that to myself, not anyone else’s. No more blaming other’s for what I’ve been failing to give to myself.

I’ve come out of the fog. I can look back and see that all of troubles and hardships, although hard won, were worth the heart ache and all of the hurt. I’m actually really proud of myself. Yes, I’ve broken down and cried (actually bawled like a baby) on more than one occasion, but a person can only handle so much. You pick yourself back up and you keep it moving. Will power, and amazing friends have pulled me out of the dark hole I was in. I didn’t know what God and the universe had in store for me. They were making me stronger, and my skin thicker so I can own 2014.  I will make 2014 my bitch. 😉

I’d like to thank all my readers and followers for reading my rants, and my raves. My ups and my downs. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Have a happy and safe New Year!

Shoes Over Booze